Erik Insists "It's Not My Fault"

 

Dammit.

-- SACREMENTO, California

As Arnold Swartzenegougher seemed assured of a victory in the craziest election ever (except maybe for the other time the Republicans stole an election in 2000), Erik insisted that the whole fiasco was "not my fault."

At a packed press conference in the state capital today, Erik told disgruntled fans that he did "everything in my power" to get a porn star elected to the governor's office, but Swartzenegougher's "huge muscles" thwarted him.

"Ask any Californian why they voted for Arnold, and they all will tell you the same thing.  He looks good on TV."

When asked why he himself didn't run for governor, Erik said, "Because there already was a porn star on the ballot.  I figured we didn't need two."

Stay with ENN for updates on Erik's condition now that he is ruled over by both Bush AND Arnold.  Oh my gentle Jesus, where is my country?!?