Erik Admitted to Graduate Schools

Women in Tucson, Arizona and Santa Barbara, California Seen "Going Absolutely Crazy"

-- TOKYO, Japan

ENN has learned that two schools in the western United States have sent congratulatory email messages to Erik, announcing their surprise intention to admit him to graduate studies beginning in Fall 2003.  Sources close to Erik tell ENN that the two schools are the University of Arizona at Tucson and the University of California at Santa Barbara.  Erik has been accepted to the graduate program in sociology at both schools.

At a press conference in the Japanese capital, Erik emphatically stated that he "did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Koizumi...  Oh, we're talking about the grad schools?  Sorry -- yes, I am so excited and very humbled by this announcement."

Erik said that he will need "some time" to "you know, look at the schools, see what they have to offer in terms of research opportunities, faculty, living conditions, and of course women."

Stay with ENN for more details on Erik's quest to become worthy of the title Dr. Love.