Microwave Oven Nearly Blows Up Love Headquarters

The Death Trap's Popcorn Bag

-- LOVE HEADQUARTERS, Japan

It all started when Erik started to do something he hadn't done in nearly two years: pop a bag of microwave popcorn.

"I was so excited," Erik said, holding back tears.  "I was about to enjoy a bag of real, honest to goodness, American-made, Act II Popcorn."  Little did Erik know, however, that Act II had become a pathetic little company since he had left the States.

Act II's so-called "quality" "product", "Real Butter Popcorn," caused a near-explosion in Erik's microwave.

"This is ridiculous," Erik director of security, Mike, told a group of visibly frightened reporters.  "I bought that bag of popcorn myself, and I was certain Erik would enjoy it.  Instead, we get FLAMES!!"

Witnesses report seeing Erik run "like a woman" after seeing flames licking out of the top his microwave and onto the popcorn bag.

"It all started when I innocently started the microwave.  Seconds later, flames were everywhere.  I didn't," Erik paused and took a breath, "I didn't know what to do.  I thought that this was the end, but somehow I survived."

Stay with ENN as we try to determine whether Japanese Prime Minister Koizumi has anything at all to do with this latest near-explosion in Love headquarters.  Click here for a related near explosion story.